Walking Away from Self-Prejudice and into Yourself

To My Lovely Kings & Queens

Let us pray: 

"Heavenly Father, Our King, Our Provider, Our Love and whole heart. As You placed the subject on my heart, I thank You for allowing the Holy Spirit to consume me and reach Your people. As I go forth, I pray that I only give my story but Your light and Spirit is heightened in me. While I personally, become decreased and You increased. That this posted is what You want, for Your glory, gospel, and Kingdom. Tear us away from anything that is not of You and allow these words to be building blocks for Christians seeking Your Kingdom wholeheartedly. Allow this to be a passage for Your children in trouble and don't know where to start when it comes to building a relationship with You. Allow me to be a true reflection, vessel, and Light for You onto others. Allow us to become bold, beautiful, and completely brave when it comes to all things of You. Father, we love You so much. Thank You for not giving Your heart in pieces and always being available for us. Thank You for not hiding Yourself just to tease us but being so faithful though we are unworthy. Thank You for being pure, teach us how to be just like You. So much less of ourselves. Amen"   

Y'all I have dilmas daily,(LITERALLY!!) I find myself labeling  myself according to how I feel on that day or by a situation that I had encountered. Most of the time, I am a baddie (😭), truly super beautiful, glowing skin, extremely goofy, smart, and I absolutely LOVE fashion so I would like to think I keep myself up (great qualities right?...yes I am single lol). This is literally 90-95% (<---unrealistic percentages) of the time and no! I am not conceited (😏), just very confident...I know what I deserve. Though other times, I get lost in the sauce, thinking that I am lacking, unworthy, or even less than on certain days. Terrible right? I would like to say that a lot of us can relate or is it just me? Am I the only one that seems to get defeated when it comes to certain things or situations like rejection? Am I the only one that battles with self- prejudices and the dangers it brings into my life?

Today, I want to challenge you sis on three things. The way you see God, the way you see yourself, and the way you see others. Some may look at my last questions and say I doubt myself and God's ability a lot. I would agree, when I first started my walk it was cute. I had an encounter with God and He lead me to never want to leave His presences. It felt that good, I was that free, and I had immediately fell in love with Christ. I didn't trust Him though! Save the dramatic grasps, we are being real and getting down to the point. I loved Him, didn't trust Him but would never be the same without Him. I was so content with that, until I learned that my life wouldn't gain the proper shift without my full dependency on my Father. This stage is where I learned that my "doubt" in God was more of self-prejudice or my opinion about myself and I didn't even have knowledge of who I was. Now follow me, because sis I am here to help you walk away from that, right into who you are ordained to be.

Prejudice is defined as an opinion you have about something or someone that is formed without knowledge. So I would say basically, a hater. When you speak down about yourself or have these preconceived thoughts about who you are or who you are supposed to be without knowing who you are in Christ says a lot about you and where you are in your walk. See so often, we carry these extremely heavy weights of titles, situations, and issues we have gained from this world. Things that were never ordained by God but we hold on praying that we become "blessed" from enduring things that was never called onto us. Meanwhile, God is continuously  giving plenty of signs to let go. Question: How can you have thoughts about yourself without opening your bible to know and fully understand what God, your Creator, says about you? 
For  Ephesians 1:7 , says " In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace." Sis, you have been saved from your past, why haven't you walked into your present?
Sis, this self-prejudice must be cut loose!!

I understand we have doubt. To have doubt or to be doubtful in yourself is to feel uncertain or to have fear. I have noticed this is normal when starting or being in your Christian walk. Doubt in yourself can be good, because it is a understanding that our trust in God has to supercede and overshadow what we can do as individuals. Proverbs 3:5, tells us to trust God and to not lean onto our own understanding. Trusting God more than doubt in ourselves is a key to going forth in God's shift for us. Having self-prejudice though, is a clear indication that you don't trust God and what He says about you. You must see Him as a liar, which damages the way you see His people. This ultimately places you in sin and completely out of His will. 

Sis, I know you can't help it. Especially, when so many things and people in this world want to believe God isn't so big and mighty. This is why as women and men of God, we MUST use God's word as our anchor and have faith. We must understand that God has no negative thought about who we are, even when we sin and allow our flesh to overshadow our soul and the Holy Spirit He sends us. We must make a very cautious decision to focus on the Lord at all times and believe the Lord no matter what! Know that God has already named you and the devil wants to affect that by giving you thoughts and emotions about yourself before you can fully understand who you are in Christ. 

WE MUST OPEN OUR BIBLES!! 

I dare you, on today, to see yourself how God sees you. Self-prejudice is extremely dangerous because if you can believe a lie about yourself, imagine what the devil can make you believe about God and His people. Believing in lies is believing in the devil's truth. These lies stop you from walking into your destiny and hinders your ability to hear from God and the promises He wants you to recieve. Let go of the fears of the world, for these fears come when we forget God is with us. God wants you to know that you are untouchable, we must live like people of faith and develop an awareness that knows you are never alone. 
(Isaiah 41:10 )
Understand that what's impossible with man is possible with God. 

I challenge you to focus on Jesus for faith and strength. Self focus will allow you to see your flaws but will also allow you to see why God chose you. The world needs you to be you! For no one benefits when you are not who you are called to be. Believe what God says about you. Fill yourself with the Word and believe the best about yourself, God, and His people. Self-prejudice has to be rejected in order for us to be in God's will. Know when God speaks He changes the perspectives of yourself.  

May you all be blessed!! I pray that self-prejudice and the dangers are no longer an issue. That we are able to rise above all things to see and recieve the glory of God while we are able to pick up our cross and truly submit to His ways. I pray that the way God sees us is enough and our hearts can fully be consume with proper teaching to cleanse anything self-prejudice brings. 

May God recieve all the glory.

Today mediate on Jeremiah 29:11, Proverbs 3:5, Isaiah 41:10 & Numbers 13:27-33
Meanwhile, check out me and other women of God guest blogs with the Eve Release ministry
http://www.theeverelease.com/blog/

Also!!!

*Follow Me On Social Media For Updates*

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Snap Chat: lovelyyyybre

FB: BreShay Warnsley

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💛Be Blessed💛

Giving Myself Away: I Didn't Know

My lovely Queens starting off the New Year, I thought it will be very important that it begins with just giving our Heavenly Father the praise He deserves. For He does so many amazing things that we just can't simply thank Him enough for. Breaking us from alcoholism, drugs, sex, lying, gossiping, and other sins alone is greater than I can ever imagine. He kept us so we can be in full surrender to His will. So let us pray.

"Father, I just want to take the time to acknowledge the goodness and mercy You have granted us a great privilege to have and follows behind us everywhere we go. Thank You for breaking us from things that were holding us hostage, for these things made us fall short of Your glory. Thank You for a daily supernatural renewal of our minds, strength, faith and the trust we have in You. Thank You for being so loving and faithful especially the times we don't deserve it. Father, we love you for being the Creator and knowing your children so well . Thank You for giving us understanding and discernment spirits  to know what we need in the seasons you are taking us through. Father, as we continue to walk with you I ask that You continue to rise all of Your children up and make them bold servants within Your Kingdom. We love you so much! Amen."

   

Sis, I know y'all like "BreShay opening up deep today!" I can't help it. When I think about the goodness of Jesus it makes me want to dance (breaks out in a baptist fit praise break 😂). Though seriously, the surrender of myself onto Christ was the greatest thing I could have ever done. It's like the release of your damaged soul to only be replace with a brand new one. Holding on to the old only clouds your judgement and keeps you away from understanding the FULL potential of receiving a new, more organized, and a prettier soul. Let me tell my brief story.

On my fourteenth birthday, my mother gifted me with gold earrings. I was obsessed!! I had been asking for them for forever and I had finally got them. I was so excited, finally a teenager and no longer the baby. I had officially entered into womanhood and was patiently waiting this menstrual cycle to arrive everybody was talking about (didn't get my until a cold day when I was 16 and quickly knew Mother Nature could have kept it but I finally got it...lol). As I opened the gift and screamed in excitement, a seriousness fell over my mother's face. She immediately called down my excitement and made me focus on what was about to be said. I got serious but concern, she spoke "Shay, you have just entered into womanhood. There are two things you should know. You will get your period, which means you can get pregnant now and I can no longer hold the burden of the relationship you have with God. It's time for you to start your own." I must have looked scared because she quickly followed her words by saying "I will still pray for you. ALWAYS! I am your mother I was always do that but it's no longer my duty to hold the burden of your relationship with God." Two bombs were dropped into my lap that day. I wasn't having sex so getting pregnant wasn't a concern of mine. These were things I knew nothing about though. I became extremely terrified, yet had so many questions. Who was God? How do I make a relationship with Him? Can I seek Him on Earth? What was I was supposed to do? Should I just pray? How do I pray?

I remembered in church they said "fear the Lord", so that's exactly what I did. I was so scared I didn't do anything but pray. Things took a drastic change and long story, extremely short. In my eyes, God couldn't have been real. There was no mercy on my environment and too many bad things were happening but I was never going to give up on God, I "feared" Him. So I started praying more and harder. The older I got the more I realized that all of what I did or didn't do was out of being scared. I decided to have a "talk" with God to release me from His hold. I was so young and extremely naive, but I didn't want to be held captive to this salvation people spoke of.

When I decided that I was going to do it my way. I talked to God about it. When I was finished it was like a huge weight was lifted off of my shoulder. I no longer felt the burden to be holy.  For Proverbs 3: 6 says "In all your ways acknowledge Him. And He shall direct your paths." So this had to be God setting me up to be what I wanted instead of what He desired. Obviously, I rationalize my wrong doings though I wasn't church grown, so a lot of what I did I never considered it be sin because I didn't know what it was. I was sinning but little did I know God's presence was so thick around me that I NEVER stop to realize from that time until I gave myself back to Him. He had blocked everything that could have greatly shifted my life or killed me. A long line of generational curses and activity that I did just because it was what everyone was doing. All these things had taken control over who I was. This had to be who God called me to be. For He loves us regardless right?

For years, I ignored the tug on my heart. I ignored the emptiness I felt. I ignored my breakdowns for no reason and thought it was all normal. Me ignoring these things only drove me deeper into my own dark pit. I didn't know how to pull myself out of confusion, uncertainty, and depression. I didn't know the goodness and peace that our Heavenly Father gave. I didn't know what an encounter what Jesus meant until I was 22 and completely broken. I didn't know Jesus, I didn't know I needed Him, I didn't know how to call and access Him, I DIDN'T KNOW!

Now I know, Jesus died so we could understand our full potential. Jesus died so we could have a friend in our time of confused days and tearful nights. He died to make sure God's children was taken care of and understood their full potential. So not surrendering is an act of selfishness and a slap in Jesus face while implying that He died for no reason. Not surrendering to God keeps you away from excelling to your full potential in Christ while limiting your quality of life and denying the world your purposeful destiny.

I don't know about you but the light God has rising up in me is too powerful for me to dim. I just can't turn off my light and turn back to my old ways. God light shines right through me and I want my anointing. So sis, we are here for the same reason right? You want to receive the anointing God has ordained into you life? Heart check!! Sis, what's stopping you from cutting off bad habits and breaking generational curses? What's stopping you from giving your heartache and Christian pain to God to renew your soul? What's stopping you from falling deeply in love with your Father that has never turn His back on you? WHAT'S STOPPING YOU?! God wants those barriers to be broken and His light to heighten in you. He wants the glory for the holy life that He will bring you to, but you have to surrender and submit to His will.

I pray that this is the start for someone to seek Jesus and trust God more. I pray that this is confirmation that giving yourself away to Christ is the right thing to do, I pray that strength grows and our faith in Him becomes stronger. I pray that the stigmas we and other people place on who we think we are become broken and we rest in who God ordered us to be. I pray that God's light ALWAYS shines through us and becomes brighter the deeper we go. I pray for all my sisters and brothers wholeness and the fight we go into everyday as Christians.  

As I start off the New Year and increase on the The Lovely Post, I want to Thank You all for showing up. I pray that someone is touched by my words and that you can refer it to someone who can also benefit from where I have been and the things God has brought me through. As we embark on this years journey together and personally, I pray that we can become bold in sharing our stories. For the truth of our lives will set us all free.  Giving yourself away and surrendering to God is the ultimate beautiful gesture. It is our tunnel to salvation and a key to receiving what we ask from God. Me not knowing how important having and maintaining a relationship with God is nothing I would wish on my worse enemy. It was a time of true deepness and depression, where it is completely terrifying to be so lost and just to think where I would be now. I find it more important to rejoice in where I am now, GLORY TO GOD!! May we all rejoice in the now!!

May you all be blessed and I pray that giving yourself away becomes easier. Don't let not knowing be the reason you fall short of God's glory and where He is trying to take you!! 

Today mediate on Jeremiah 29:11, Proverbs 3:6, Romans 6:22 & John 8:36
Meanwhile, check out me and other women of God guest blogs with the Eve Release ministry
http://www.theeverelease.com/blog/

Also!!!

*Follow Me On Social Media For Updates*

https://twitter.com/_LovelyyyyBre

Snap Chat: lovelyyyybre

FB: BreShay Warnsley

Instagram:@_lovelyyyybre

💛Be Blessed💛

The 2017 Return...Excited?

Hello Lovelies!!!

This week I will be back with blogs....EVERY WEEK!!! Yes!!! EVERY WEEK!!!! 

On Wednesdays!!!😎

I wanted to take some time at the top of the year to consider, pray, and fast on the direction I wanted to go with my blog and God has spoken!!!

2017 is the year of just going and moving. I AM HERE FOR IT!! 

Things to look forward to this year in the Lovely Post:

• Guest bloggers
• Openness on my life and things I am going through
• Stories
• Things I am working on within God's kingdom
• My journey within the millennial church 
• Challenges
• & so much more.

I am extremely excited for all that God is doing and I pray that my words are a blessing and reach the hearts that desires to hear from God. 

May you all be blessed and hope that you are excited as I am.
Meanwhile, check out me and other women of God guest blogs with the Eve Release ministry
http://www.theeverelease.com/blog/

*Follow Me On Social Media For Updates*

https://twitter.com/_LovelyyyyBre

Snap Chat: lovelyyyybre

FB: BreShay Warnsley

Instagram:@_lovelyyyybre

💛Be Blessed💛

Deciding Not To Quit

Here it is, the last couple of weeks in December and I am excited for it.

2016 was, a lack of for better terms, HELL! It beat me to my core until I was sick. I spent days on my knees, up late in the midnight hours crying, mind raced a mile a minute DAILY and on top of that I lost EVERYTHING!! Not a sweet cute, oh I have to get my life together everything but EVERYTHING!

For me though, it is NEVER about material things. I understand and will always understand that material things come and go. I have always been blessed with a level of high discernment when it comes to understanding certain aspects of life, especially when they involve knowing the value of "things". I value life more than anything, I use to read a lot of urban fiction where there was drug dealing and shootings which allowed me to understand that losing someone isn't easy. Due to my ability to read and be very empathic, I thought it would get me ready for when I had to experience death. I learned quickly, IT DID NOT!! I still have to deal with the reality of mourning and not seeing someone I use to see all the time. This gives me an advantage in my walk. I got to understanding that life eventually ends and we have to go through the "motions" in order to get through it. I thought for a long time,I had to be "strong", I had to put on this "face" that everything is fine, and that it's just the motions. 2016 taught me that being broken before the Lord is what makes us strong. That the only way to be strong is to be weak, and the only way to be weak is to let the motions happen. I've learned that only through the process of weakness and prayer, strength comes. This births a testimony that eventually helps someone who is watching you closely to see what God is doing upon your life. I became satisfied, they become healed.

I value family (which includes my friends). My family is my life!!!! Wanting to be so much like them but being so different as well. Inheriting a lot of characteristics but also branching off and allowing God to work on me. A lot of people call me unique. God has been revealing just how unique I am. When I wanted to be like everyone else and "fit in" nothing went well for me. Being by myself, experiencing who I am, staying away from influences, and truly walking where God leads me brings me joy. I HAVE SO MUCH JOY!!! This joy is comes from my family and everything they are broken or fixed, good or bad, my family is prideful, strong, and rooted to everything we know. I am PROUD!!

I value love and time. I LOVE LOVE!!! I have always loved love. I will always love love!! SHOOT, my favorite holiday is Valentines (LOL). This will NEVER change!! In 2014-2016, I use to think that so many people I loved, wanted to see how far they could go before I allowed them to break me. Through being internal or out of pure unawareness, I wanted so bad to be the victim. I wanted to hold on to grudges and be so stuffed up with unforgiveness that I became stiff. I wanted everyone to hurt like I did. I wanted to see people cry in public just as they made me cry in private. EVERYONE who did not save me needed to feel the pain, but I couldn't be heartless anymore. I seeked everyone out to ask for forgiveness and cried out to God in prayer on my face EVERY night to be healed from such terrible spirit. I wanted forgiveness for the people I could not reached who I have hurt, asking for forgiveness for myself, and pleaded to God to have mercy on all of our souls, it was all apart of the timing. Time revealed to me I never knew what love was, I have never been in love, and creating my own definition of love is degrading to God who has given us the ability to have the perfect love inside of us. 2016 taught me that time/timing is everything, our best friend and more importantly I can not be broken.

In 2016, I decided not to quit. As I went through the motions, being broken, being humbled, losing pridefulness, being myself, taking the L's (slang for loses) it threw at me, loving harder than ever, forgiving, asking for forgiveness, holding my tongue, learning about my Heavenly Father, being a complete nerd and giving up the ideas of what people think about me. Hearing God whisper to me to just endure and how He loves me so, even though I am seriously a messed up individual, has been the best year of my LIFE!!! I am forever grateful!!


May, 2017 be in all of our favor. To God be the glory and victory!!

2 Chronicles 15:7
But you, be strong and do not let your hands be weak, for your work shall be rewarded!"

Isaiah 41:10
Fear not, for I am with you; Be dismayed, for I ma your God.
I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand."

*I would love to hear from you!!!, leave a comment. Have you decided not to give up?*

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It's POWER in your Tongue!!

Hello Lovelies,

Last week was a tough one in the presences of the Lord. Through doubt, self- love was placed on my heart. God allowed me to realize that throughout my journey, self-worthiness has been hard on me. Deciding if I am worthy enough to truly live out my life to the fullest and to seek God's kingdom or "just be me" was extremely hard. Especially when you feel like you are not worthy enough to receive everything our Father wants us to receive.

This world will get to us quick and attack us from the inside, out. So, it is extremely important that we stay rooted in the word of God. Things like my job, family, car issues, school, friends, and situations were affecting the way I thought about myself. It's HARD especially when you are fully in obedience to God, on your face daily, and being faithful. BUT your self love is lacking, as if God is like these human boys sending us (women) mixed signals on what we deserve.

Y'all listen, I am TRULY LIVING for Christ. I am in complete surrender to my Lord and Savior. On my face everyday and every night, church faithfully, and being obedient. I was spending time with Him every morning and night, submitted to Him everyday, and prayed all the time, but I still felt unworthy of His saving grace. I knew I couldn't rest there because God has been too good, raised me out of my dead situation and gave me life again. I needed to fix this!!

Here I am defeated and throwing the towel in on my worth. When on Saturday I attended a breast cancer luncheon with one of my sisters in Christ and while one of the panelist was PREACHING!! I heard the Holy Spirit say "Who gave you the spirit of defeat?", it shocked me. As I stood there and tried to make excuses as to why the spirit of defeat was on me. God showed me that even when I was younger I KNEW, I was going to win. So I looked in the mirror and asked myself, "Who gave you the spirit of defeat?"

The answer was.....Me!

I had got so caught up in my own head and being a ex-worldly girl I didn't even remember that Ephesians 2:8 says "For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourself; it is the gift of God," 

So now I'm defeated, SELFISH, and rejected the amazing gift from God. Like wow, BreShay, REALLY?? I had to face Him through prayer. Who was I to say that I am truly living for God but denying the fact that being saved through my faith was a gift from God that I didn't deserve on my own account through my own mind.....WHAT??! Ladies and gentlemen this is a CLEAR example on exactly why you should NOT lean onto your own understanding because quite frankly, really truly...HONESTLY it can be very stupid at times.

I think I make my point!! You are your worse enemy. The devil does his part but it's all in the power of your tongue. If you choose to speak non-sense, the lack of self worthiness, and defeat into your life that's what you will recieve. (Proverbs 18:21) 

Today, choose to speak ALL godly and good things into your life. God wants us to recieve more, abundantly, and strength. Ask Him for guidance if you get stuck but NEVER take it into your own hands. You will be speaking things on your life God NEVER sent.

*Remember I would LOVE to hear your saving grace stories! Write/email me*

The Introduction: You are my EVERYTHING & I love you right now!!

Welcome Back Lovelies

During my various breaks, today was the toughest day ever!! 
God pushed me even farther. To not only come before Him but to come before you guys to tell my truth. Taking me completely out of my comfort zone to truly understand that my walk is a reflection of His grace and mercy, but I shall not make it personal and selfish. My testimony is His victory wrapped in sugar and honey to be served on  a gold platter that helps others through their troubles. It shall not be taken for granted. He made me understand that there is work to be done and when I am not being specific in my prayers, it causes a hinderous to my abilities to hear Him.

Today, my Father allowed Heaven to pour out and surround me. I have never felt this feeling before, for it is completely unexplainable but it is the most beautiful, joyful experience God has brought me to. He allowed me to know that an impact of His kingdom doesn't come if I am hiding or not expressing myself to the fullest of my potential. For this is all towards the advancement of His kingdom and the love He has shown continuously. 

Father, you are my everything. I love you so much and truly appreciate you for allowing Heaven to come despite my selfish attempts to ignoring the calling you have on my life. You have proved yourself and have showered me with unconditional love, care, kindness, grace, and undeniable mercy for I am still here living proof that You offer a supernatural healing which I am forever in debt to you for. You're so good to us and love us so much, so this is dedicated to you the Introduction of my calling since I was a little girl. I have become fully aware of who I am and will use my platform to encounter new people to You. 

Father, I just ask that you help me to become a vessel for your word, a servant to others, and a pure woman of You. Amen.

*Don't hesitate to write me your Introduction, testimony, & why you love our Father*

A Declaration to Him and His Love

Currently sitting on my bed, listening to Keyshia Cole, thinking and thanking God for my day. As I proceed to start my April book, that I had for a while but never had the chance to get into because of school. I open the front and a piece of paper fell out labelled "To: BreShay" Hesitantly, I took a deep breath and opened it. A huge smiley face on the top and writing right below.  It says:

"This is the first Valentines Day where I write out the "Valentine" personally. You mean so much to me Shay and I hope you know that . I want to show you just how much one day, but until then I hope my love will be enough.........that and the dates and flowers and the other cornball things your boyfriend loves to do. 

I love you baby...signed his name."

I smiled, then burst into tears. How is this still my life? How can we fall in love but can't fall out? For so long all I've wanted to do was to get over him, to not remember anything, to talk about it and be understood that my heart was in it. But I AM HURT, my feelings are shot and my heart is broken. I have for so long wanted people to just listen to me like I did in their situations but only about him. Nobody had any words for me, nor did they listen, and friends told me to get a hobby (as though this was suppose to stop my thoughts and feelings). So I decided to bottle it in, pretend as though I don't care but these things don't change my feelings. Though I don't hurt as much and took time to understand my worth and value. I won't downplay myself for someone who doesn't want to go the extra mile to make us work.

My battle though, is with the what if's. What if we could have worked it out or what if we were more mature, what if he could of understood me and me understand him. More so WHAT IF WE WOULD HAVE JUST TOOK A MOMENT?! Away from emotions and pride, hugged and said I love you one more time. What if we CARE more than we had miscommunication. What if he needed me, like I needed him and What if we thought it was, WE were worth it. What if at the end of the day we chose each other instead of the separate situations we were in. W H A T I F, we knew nothing was worth our love and We knew the universe was trying to drive us apart. What if God was testing us and we fail terribly. What if we weren't so stubborn?

I have battled with this so much and though there aren't many questions I can answer I can just ask God for guidance and that He keeps me focused through my trying times, whenever they appear. I was talking to a good friend the other day and we were discussing the deal breakers in our relationships and what we have to do as women to go the extra mile to secure our relationships with men we consider our best friends and lured us in to talk about marriage, how do we get those to work? Understanding that we will forever have trying times and we will make the commitment but where do we draw the line and how do we draw the line? Would we need counselling? Can we overlook deal breakers?

My Declaration to You & Our Love 

This year would have been five years with an amazing growing man, because I valued him and our relationship I will declare my love.

Sir, when I met you six years ago you were not my type. As I got to know you you became my best friend, a soul mate, a provider, a protector, my lover, my journal, and shoulder to cry on. You became more than I could have ever expected and I thank you for that. I put you on and extremely high pedestal, which probably was the down fall to our relationship because you could do no wrong in my eyes and when you did it was WW3, which I knew the feeling was vice versa. I want to apologize for that because I know we are human and do human things. 

I want to thank you for being so much more for me and being an experience that I would NEVER forget. You truly took care of me and I will forever love you for that. You taught me communication, love, and called me out on my B.S. You were always honest with me no matter how I reacted and I appreciate that more than you would ever know.
I never wanted anything but a friend, you became a person that I knew I couldn't live without. Though it's hard to this day, I still think about calling you first when things are good and bad because you truly were my best friend. I use to dream daily on being your wife and coming home to you every night. Thank you for giving me that much love. I still have hope for our friendship.
This is not to say I'm in love with you, because I don't know if I am. Though my trust is shattered with you, I still hold you dare in my heart. I will forever root for you and be your biggest cheerleader. I wish our future relationships feel the way you felt when you wrote the letter and how I felt the first time I read it. I could go on but I will leave it at...Take care of yourself. Truly take care of yourself, like I took care of you when you were sick. I do and always will love you.




Honestly could care less of anybody feelings for this post. I made it mean it!!!

Good Night.